[personal profile] saltdawg
I'm wondering if maybe I really DID cheat death on one of all those occasions and I'm paying the price with having to live with a rotting soul. Festering. With a palpable odour about it.

I'm not saying that I literally "stink". At least I hope I don't, but I really stink. I've been a horrible person, and I stand here before you, in my boxers, and declare that I'm going to turn this shit around.

In another week or so. At least.

And I really AM sorry.

Date: 2010-06-15 03:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
"I've been a horrible person, and I stand here before you, in my boxers, and declare that I'm going to turn this shit around."

Funny, I'm looking all around and I'm seeing no swarthy half-dressed seaman standing anywhere near me!

If it's absolution you're looking for...

You're gonna have to confess your sins first.

Here's a nudge...

"What's troubling you, my child?"

Date: 2010-06-15 04:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I'm not "swarthy"

I'm scotch and Lithuanian. I'm practically CLEAR.

Also, I'm wearing mis-matched socks. But the sentiment reigns true. I'm going to turn this motherfucker outside-in, if I survive this next two weeks.

I make these promises without high hopes.

Date: 2010-06-15 06:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Dude, that story was just getting really good. why the hell did you hang up on me?

Date: 2010-06-15 11:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I live in a cellular dead zone. I'm sorry...I don't remember what stoty I was telling, but I didn't hang up on you. And I Luv you to pieces!

Date: 2010-06-15 03:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I still maintain that half of the problem is your phone. Call me when you get the new iphone.

Date: 2010-06-15 03:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
You've taken care of me on more than one occasion. Don't beat up on my friend.

Date: 2010-06-15 06:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Aww, All I've ever done is go "blah blah blah I'm so wicked cool Blah blah blah." and kept your mind off of stuff.

Also, my sister was MORTIFIED that youze guyz saw her vacuuming in her Night-Gown the other day. I NEVER should have given her that french door.

Date: 2010-06-15 05:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
You don't have to apologize to us. We love you no matter what.

Especially that maniac chick who lives in Chicago. :)

Date: 2010-06-15 06:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Thanks little one!

But that Maniac chick from Old San Juan has a leg up on you.

As far as being a maniac, that is.

Date: 2010-06-16 10:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
<3 always.

Date: 2010-06-17 07:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
after we deal with the other stuff, we are going to adress your problem with picking your nose...


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